Unpleasantness

[eirias]

Here are some things that are unpleasant and I can't figure out why.

1) Not being understood in conversation. I don't just mean when discussing emotional topics - that seems like less of a mystery to me, because when you're already keyed up, your threshold for further annoyance is probably pretty low. I'm thinking of the times when I'm on the phone with someone and they don't understand my speech or I'm talking at cross-purposes with someone in that "who's on first?" way. When this happens, I always feel this wave of irritation propagate through my consciousness and I have to consciously suppress it, because really, what kind of jerk snaps at a person for bad parsing?

2) Having songs in my head. It's kind of a banal unpleasantness, I guess, but I've never found a good reason for it to be unpleasant at all. I mean, often the songs themselves are just fine, likeable even. And yet I've had days where I walk around with songs on repeat taking up so much brain space that I nearly want to bash my head in just to make it stop, and I try to focus on the traffic or clear my mind and I just can't.

3) Being addressed by two people at once. This happens most often when I am on the phone and someone in the room overhears my conversation and wants to chime in. It's not nearly as bad when I'm on the phone and that same someone tries to get my attention for an unrelated reason, probably because in those cases I have more notice so I can say to the person on the other end, "Hold on a minute."

These are three things that, secretly, deep down, make me irrationally frothy.

Comments

[lyonesse.livejournal.com]

2. *nod* my musicality overall was entirely unimpaired; it was just the mental soundtrack that went missing. i remembered, learned, and composed music throughout that period, and then when i went off the drug the soundtrack came back. (mine is usually relatively unobtrusive, but it's definitely not GONE like it was on clonazepam.) i do wonder if you'd experience that if you tried that drug, or if it was purely an idiosyncratic response in my case.